'Tis Already the Party Season??

Hey, look....I am an intelligent woman, and I have opinions and concerns and three children whose future is what I live for, but frankly...I am continuing to stick my head in the sand on this "global financial crisis" issue, even though all the beloved men in my life (dads, husbands, brothers, friends, gay boyfriends and all) insist on yanking me out of my denial...why is that??? I say we just pretend we have nothing to worry about and all the time in the world to focus on important issues like celebrity sightings (Jen K.T. spotting Barry Gibb getting into a Bentley up on Madison Avenue is a killer....) and shoe shopping and new lipgloss and the yes, the upcoming party season...My favorite!!

Ok, so....even though I am hosting no less than 60 people as the first stop on the neighborhood's Snack-O-Lantern Trick-or-Treat fest this Friday, I am already partially over the Halloween fun and games (yes, I know we are still a day out...but I think a windy, rain-soaked trek through Sleepy Hollow looking for the Headless Horseman last Saturday night may have put the proverbial nail in my coffin...am just waiting it out now....).

So instead, I have moved right into Holiday Planning mode....and if you think I mean that I have started my shopping you are totally off-base....if you have learned one thing about me it is that I work best under pressure....I will be wrapping up a stack of Vineyard Vines ties and Shep Shirts and Chappy trunks for every guy on my list no sooner than Christmas Eve. My poor kids...my jealous and possessive five year old son calls out to me every five minutes with another Christmas gift request for some crappy, useless hunk of plastic he has just seen advertised during breaks from SpongeBob. Oh, and I know that in four weeks I will be frantically searching the internet, trying to recall what toys and games he has mentioned...in fact, as I write he just yelled something about some MegaSaur Power Ranger (WTF???)...please remind me in a few weeks. It's that part of the Christmas season always screws me....

But....Holiday Parties, well that's another thing altogether. I am a calculated planner when it comes to all things celebratory, so of course I have to be certain weeks in advance that my plans are in place so that I may fully enjoy the Thanksgiving to New Years weeks to the fullest extent. So far this year I have made arrangements to host two dinner parties in November (one for girls only so expect a revelatory post after that event...), started planning my Thanksgiving menu (onion walnut muffins...always a hit...), lining up weekend babysitters, picking out outfits (not kidding...) and am filling my Christmas Party calendar (all my standing annual engagements will be in order once Dirk Diggler settles on a date for the Wyckoff Swingers Holiday Swing-A-Thon....hope Scotty arrives in his new Datsun 280 ZX!). Yes....priorities....

This all reminded me of the first Christmas Cocktail Party that Rob and I threw as a married couple....December of 1996. I was already an experienced hostess, we had spent our engagement inviting friends to our tiny apartment on Morton Street for casual dinners and Oscar viewing parties and New Year's kickoff cocktails, but this party was major effort, the follow-up to our big wedding only eight weeks earlier. Instead of jamming everyone we knew into our sixth floor walk-up, we hosted at my parents' pied-a-terre on East End Avenue and 82nd, the absolute opposite end of the City from our scrappy West Village dwelling. The apartment was flawlessly decorated and featured two balconies overlooking the East River...and Mom and Dad never really used it....perfect place to party!

I must have been influenced by the uptown surroundings because I thought I was a mini Martha Stewart...all growed up with my fancy tray of hors d'oeuvres, pates and expensive imported cheeses, white wine and champagne (still love it...). Modeling myself after Martha's ice-blooded WASP aesthetic with crisp, tasteful holiday decorations and classic Christmas carols coming across the speakers. I even remember what I wore -- a Rachel-from-Friends-like tiny black velvet mini-skirt and black fitted sleeveless sweater from Armani Exchange, black tights and 3-inch stacked patent leather pumps. My hair was newly cut after returning from my honeymoon, a sleek, chin-length little bob...so Manhattan in the mid-90's.

What I remember most about that party was that everyone who came was so impressed...they thought it was such a great time and loved my food and appreciated my grasciousness and reveled in the festive Christmasy vibe I had created. Not me though...I was stressing out the entire night...I think I felt all this pressure to be fabulous, but honestly, I kind of felt like a little girl playing dress-up in a fancy apartment while her parents were out of town. It was like it had all just struck me -- I was a married woman, but still a baby at age 26, hosting other adults in a genteel setting and yet no one is calling me out as some pretender...how did I get here??? Suddenly in these grown up surroundings, I was a little out of sorts, and longed to peel off my chic little get-up and curl up on the couch...I know, can you believe it? There was a party happening around me and I wasn't having a good time?? Truly shocking. I think that may have been the last time that phenomena occurred...but it really happened. You know me though....I plowed through, smiling the whole time and kissed the last guest good night well past 1 a.m.

Yeah...we stuck to entertaining in our own home after that night...The only other time I ever hosted an event on East End Avenue it was some kind of clebratory dinner with people from work for my Kratz BFF, Jim (was it a birthday? or was he leaving the firm...now that was cause for celebration back then....). And I had a blast because Jim cracked me up endlessly...but that was nothing out of the ordinary.

So, I have thrown and attended countless gatherings since that first foray in to Christmas Cocktailing and I have found that people just appreciate a place to meet and see one another and toast the season...whatever season it may be...so I don't put so much pressure on myself anymore. I have relaxed ever so slightly...you know, maybe not all the napkins are fanned out perfectly and an occasional shrimp will be out of place on the platter and I will happily look the other way if someone wants to play DJ... because I want to have fun too...I am kind of selfish that way...

Oh, by the way....you can mark my words -- by no later than December 15th, I will become completely bored and overwhelmed with shopping and planning and partying and will be looking beyond Holiday Season towards my Week-long Birthday Extravaganza -- March 8, 2009....so save the date now!!

Photo 1: Sexy 70's falsetto icon and Bentley owner, Barry Gibb...

Photo 2: Some neighborhood kiddies in front of my house posing for Snack-O-Lantern '07....there I am way in the back serving gallons of wine to the spent moms...

Photo 3: Ellie and I kicking off the '07 Party Season rocking some face painting and puff pastry hors d'oeuvres at the Arcola Country Club annual family bash -- our third party that day...

Photo 4: Yes, it's the Wyckoff Swingers....my man Scotty all the way to the right devising a plan to get Dirk into the Datsun...

Photos 5 and 6: Delicious party acoutrements...you can always depend on me to bring it...

Photo 7: Suz as young bride with Dad...my career as hostess extraordinaire a mere glimmer in his proud, adoring eyes. I know...it is a great shot...

Photo 8: Some real swingers...partying on my deck...raspberry mojitos in hand...mmm, raspberry mojitos...

Photo 9: The real Holiday celebration I look forward to...my birthday, chocolate cake and my boos...